Chow time with kids can go either way. Every day is a new adventure with the fickle offspring. For a parent, planning and preparing meals is likely a daunting task and can make for tension around mealtimes. Finding what pleases everyone in a family could make you wish for a chef.
Kids have a love-hate relationship with food. Have you ever noticed how fast their favorite meal this week is the hated one next week? When you think you’ve found a mealtime pattern of happiness, those little monsters go switching things up. In our house, a favorite saying is, “Which way is the wind blowing today?” Meaning, do you like bananas (or some other food) or not? I still say this to my 13-year-old-eye roll!
I’ll be honest here, with almost 32 years of experience raising 7-of-those-that-make-us-question-everything, I found no magic that has them approve or disapprove a specific food. Nor have I concocted any spell that makes my offspring try everything I put in front of them. The best tip I learned, by default; The busier I was the less I worried about what they were eating.
Don’t worry; I didn’t let them starve or eat ring dings (are they even still around?) for breakfast. I always put out a plate of nutritionally balanced food and prayed for the best. Sometimes I was lucky and other times, not so much. Depending on my hustle of the day, I may choose to fight about chow time with kids or let it go.
No Perfection Here
Truthfully, I raised my children in a home where we offered foods in their most natural state as possible-most of the time. We belonged to CSA’s, planted food in our yard, had reciprocal bounty sharing with friends, went to Farmer’s Markets, frequented health food stores, and tried to teach the brood how crucial healthy food was to our existence.
There was no perfect parenting, though! We still had the occasional fast food stop, boxed food night, or indulgent dessert. We did our best to instill good choices with balance as they evolved into young adults. We were hoping that we inspired enough for them to make healthy decisions throughout their lives. From infancy through adulthood, each child had their food quirks.
As you probably have figured by now, it’s impossible to keep those youngsters in a bubble. They quickly learn all about the foods you’re trying to limit, from friends and other family members or commercials and society in general. Nevermind attending another little one’s birthday party, complete with all the processed, food dye, deep-fried, sugar-laden carbs you can find.
So What’s a Parent to Do?
My current binge-watching TV show is set in the 1700s, and while it may not be a perfect depiction, I have been observing how the children were parented. Good, bad, or indifferent-who knows? I will attest that 300 years ago when it was mealtime, everyone sat together and had a bowl or plate with the same food. Chow time with kids was no different. Either they ate what they had or went hungry. Sounds simple, right?
As with all things parenting by today’s standards, we put too much time effort and energy into overthinking childrearing-including feeding them. Maybe if we had chores from sun up to sun down like those yesteryears, we wouldn’t be helicopter parents. Those families had no time to worry about everything little Billy did all day long. Plus, those children had chores a good portion of the time as well, even at 4-5-6 years old.
So, for the sake of simplicity, why not back off? Keep a regular mealtime plan, limit the options, set down a colorful plate of whole foods, and go about your own business. No conversation about food, no debate, no switching anything-just plain old “this is what you get!” What’s the worst that could happen? Hungry kid, temper tantrum, wasted food, arguments amongst adults or with child-or both? All manageable. Enough hunger and eventually, they would concede the battle.
Just In Case; For Chow Time with Kids
Besides the “back off” method, I do have a few tips I found helpful through the years. Some worked better on one tot or another, but overall these were successful resolutions for chow time with kids.
- Stick to a routine whenever possible. Kids thrive on a predictable day.
- Avoid letting the tykes snack an hour before dinner. Hungrier is better.
- Encourage building an appetite. Outside play, chores, exercise, or just dancing can burn extra calories and ensure they will eat when they’re at the table.
- Make the ambiance upbeat. Have a pleasant meal conversation. Save any heated discussions for after mealtime.
- Give a warning message, bell, music, etc. 10 minutes before the kid needs to eat. They don’t like to disrupt playtime, and this will help make the transition.
- Enlist the help of those that will be eating. Even simple things for smaller ones like carry the cups to the table.
- Keep distractions out of the eating area, including all screens, toys, mail, homework, movies, etc.
- Please don’t force them to clean their plate. Whatever the little ones finish is a windfall.
- Give a set time limit that everyone has to stay at the table (10-15 minutes is okay- just be consistent). Remind them it is family time.
- No negotiating or bribing. It sets you up for more problems in the long run.
- Make an appropriate sized plate. Use the 1 tablespoon per age rule in the early years. For example, a 2-year-old would get 2 tablespoons worth of chicken, vegetables, and rice; 3 TBS for a 3-year-old, 4 TBS for a 4-year-old, you get the drift.
- Limit beverages at mealtimes and keep it to water only.
- Be a good role model. Try not to show your displeasure with food around the children. You can share the things that don’t tickle your palate at another time.
- Don’t buy junk. Or, if you do, keep it hidden. Kids don’t NEED cookies, soda, and donuts as a rule.
- Practice shopping with the children and teaching them about healthy meal planning.
Conspiracy at Chow Time
As I’ve mentioned before, there is no magic potion to make mealtimes be calm and belly-filling for the monsters in your home. These suggestions may work most of the time, but there is no guarantee from one day to the next those cherubs won’t convert their tastebuds. Sometimes, I believe they don’t want to be too predictable. After all, it’s more fun to keep us on our toes.
